A different kind of posting;

Sometime in April, May and June, I had my semester 6 posting at a few specialty places. It was one of a kind and unforgettable.

Now let me tell you my story.
1.
Our first stop was to Tanjung Rambutan, at Hospital Bahagia Ulu Kinta (HBUK). It was for our mental health (module) posting. 

We've been to...
-the psycho-geriatric ward
-the normal ward (Ward 2 & 3)
-rehabilitation wards (Ward 7 & 8)
-the ECT (electroconvulsive therapy) room
-the library and
-the centre where the recovering patients actually WORK - making handicrafts for visitors, assembling flowers, tailoring and so much more. They are actually trained to adapt to the working life when they are discharged later. When I mentioned that they are TRAINED, each of them has a punch card and respective off day just like a normal worker. /impressed/

I have bought some souvenirs from the centre because hands down, all the handicrafts were really  impressive!

There were a few dramas during our time being posted there. A few hurdles rose, it kinda shook each of us as the drama was nothing small but a dang serious thing that all of us cannot forget. Nevertheless, I was so glad that we went through together as a team, never pointed fingers to anyone, instead solved it together as one. :)

When we were there, we stayed at the hostel situated a kilometer away from the hospital. Speaking of THAT, I shared a room with my dear (P)s - Prissy and Pau and we sort of had a blast sleeping and giggling together every night. HAHAHAHA. 

I can never forget the 'bugs' moment, 'cats, cats everywhere'  conversation, 'omg it is lizard!' situation, the scorching heat days, the 'shit smell' story during one of those midnights, my burnt fan story, and those nights when we practised (our Hokey Pokey dance) for the 'party' on the last day of our posting! lulz.

Such great memories, man.

But what really left an impact on me was a few touching moments that we had gained during our posting experience. One of patients there actually handwritten us a letter in Mandarin Chinese, to thank our company and presence. I mean... we were only in each designated ward for a couple of days and all we did was just talking, spending time doing activities with them and doing nothing much, really. To the point that we were appreciated is just :'). 

Actually to be honest, seeing patients laughed happily and seeing them changed from being quiet to engage themselves with us in most of the activities was one of our best accomplishments!

However, reading patients' documents on their past history and hearing them telling us made me feel very upset. Broken relationships, abandoned family, inability to cope with stress, and their frequent questions to us, "Where are my children?" and "When can I go home?" really teared the inner me apart.
I was also shocked to see those mentally ill patients who are placed at the psychogeriatric wards. Some of the shocking habits (I wish not to disclose here) were very depressing and these two words 'human values' really striked me bad and I have reflected so much from it.

But one definite lesson that I have learnt was,


"Each of the patient there despite having mental illness deserves to receive all the human rights, respect, nonjudgmental comments and treatments. We all (regardless whether we are healthcare providers or just simple human being) have to always be empathy, sensible, wise, fair and sensitive. Be a human being to another human being."


I will on and off read back this invaluable thought and remind myself to be grateful, to be all of the above said.

... On the last day, after the party that we organised for the patients, I was quite reluctant to leave but I guess two weeks was impactful enough to let me learn. The only shame part was that we did not get to go to any of the admission wards, that is the Wad Kemasukan Lelaki/Perempuan. Cuz' we were told that there were more acute cases that we can see there. Oh wells, no luck for us then.

14 days but so much of memories.


__
2.
Second stop was at Petaling Jaya - Alzheimer's Disease Foundation Malaysia.
We had our Healthy Ageing (module) posting at there. No doubt, it was another memorable posting that I shared with my classmates.

Basically, what we did there was quite routinised.
The morning was started off with 'brain-gym exercise', then followed by morning breakfast for the clients, then karaoke session and arts and crafts session until lunch. After lunch there will be interactive games planned by the ADFM staffs for all the clients to spend their time in the afternoon while they wait for their loved ones to fetch them back from the centre.

Looking at the display at the memorial wall, I was impressed by the handicrafts that the Alzheimer clients made during arts and craft session. So artistic and creative I give them all a thumbs up! We were there for two weeks -in which we mainly observed during the first day of posting, then subsequently (slowly) taking over from the staffs to organize the activities by our own. We did not adjust/alter much (just change some content of) the routinised activities (slightly) because it might cause confusion especially for those clients with Alzheimer's disease. 

..
Truth be told, it was one of the most relaxing postings I have ever had. Spending time interacting with the clients made me happy.

I still remember encouraging Mr. W in one of those A&C sessions because he was feeling quite timid and low self esteem at first. But with constant motivation and support, I was glad to have boosted up his self confidence that he was all smiling from ear to ear after his 3D (DIY) dinosaur, "Long Life" (he named it himself) was properly done. 

Shortly after that, he invited me for a dance during one of those karaoke sessions, lol. I was taken aback but at the same time I was  genuinely touched for such gesture. :') This 'bravo' client has wonderful  smile, sings beautifully and he was one of those inspiring people I met whom I won't forget.

And to conclude this posting, a major thanks to all the ADFM staffs for being so nice, friendly and accommodating. All of you have such caring heart yourselves, please keep it up the excellent job and may God bless you all always. :)

People often ask me, "So when you were talking to people with Alzheimer's, they often forget what they did/say thus they always repeat, don't they?"

Yes. They forget, thus we are there to remind them, to care for them. Caring for people with Alzheimer's is not easy but think back how your parents took care of you when you were young, that's how exactly we should take care of them. They might be forgetful, misplaced things, clumsy, hard to please, but with patience, compassion and great amount of love, you will get through this. Get a respite care when you need, take a break when you're tired.

Also, don't forget to offer your hugs and kissed to your loved ones (although they have Alzheimer's disease)! It is an important physical affection, they will feel happy just like us normal human beings. We feel loved whenever our dear ones gave us a touch/hug/kiss, don't we? :)

"Although they can never remember what we did to them, they certainly will not forget how we made them feel." :) :)

These are some of the lessons I have learnt through a 'Alzheimer's disease-caregiver' talk and also during this posting.
__


3.
Next up, Management posting.
One word : Stressful.

Super, super stressful actually.
Having to juggle between workload (research, incidental-reflective writings), tasks (Team leader, medication nurse, runner), coping with functional nursing, work shifts, tiredness, long distance travel... those days surely weren't easy.

BUT the interesting part of the posting was surprisingly the night shifts days. Hahaha! I must declare that I was one of those who didn't drink a sip of coffee yet survived those wee-and-dawn hours with so much style and pride. #shamelessconfessionhere
Oh well, it was an experience but I am not too sure whether I can cope in the near future. Imagine night shift today, then afternoon shift the next day, etc?

And another incidence I will not forget is definitely 'Dexamethasone 1mg.' Please remember forever, pk.

Also, I'd like to thank some of the staffs there who taught me patiently on how TS Hospital actually works in terms of management and also C.I. for giving me good input for nursing tasks such as passing over report. Despite the struggles that we went through, I still thank YOU olls. :)

___

4. 

Klinik Kesihatan Pedas is next! *woots*

Actually I wasn't expecting a lot for this posting because I had no time to expect to be honest. Hahaha but going back to Seremban feels great. That was my last time staying at Bukit Rasah at Uncle D's. Last time intruding clinical school like nobody's business and last time being member of the Rasah neighbourhood! :)

Community posting was surprisingly fun for me. We started off with school visits and clerking pregnant mummies as well as kids in the first week. It was my first time giving vaccines (MR and DT) to school children. Albeit feeling super nervous, surely it was a cool experience. :)) Subsequently we went for home visits for antenatal and postnatal cases. Pedas is situated near to Rembau, a small town not far away but houses around are made of wood and this small town has a lot of 'kampung' feel which I lovelovelove.

So during home visits, we clerked the patient, checked on the babies, did some anthropometric measurements, updating mum and child's progress in the very important (pink and blue) book that every mum and child suppose to have. On the last week of this posting, we also did a 'mopping' session, meaning we traveled to houses to enquire the families on the updated immunisation status of their children. As you all knew, diphtheria cases went viral due to parents refused to vaccinate the child last July.

"Vaccinations are very important, dear parents. Bring your children to the nearest clinic to get the jab if any of them missed a dose/hasn't taken any vaccines before! Please have a thought about it, it is always better be safe than sorry."

... Back to the story, during the 'mopping' session, we went visit houses near the estates and railway track. Along the journey, we met some friendly chickens, running goat, a family of dogs, cute kittens , a unique duck, an active squirrel and many many palm trees!

Ahh the 'kampung' feel. Love, love! 

Hands down again, this is definitely one of the best postings that I will not forget! Special thanks to all the KKIA staffs for being so amazing and patience in teaching us the proper way of clerking pregnant mums and kids. Thanks to Mdm L and Pn K for always encouraging us to try and do a lot of hands on. FYI, community nurses are very EMPOWERED and basically they are the ones who run the clinic, other than the other healthcare providers like DUH. /proud/

Also, I will not forget the good times I had together lunching and decorating the 'breastfeeding' room with my classmates. :)

Such a memorable posting. That's all for this post. Till then, y'all!

xx

Gratitude ;

Good news today!

My patient is discharged with her baby girl just this afternoon :) #cheers

.......
Being able to nurse this patient is definitely a golden opportunity for me and my learning experience. Two weeks ago, she was diagnosed with Extended Breech in which she was supposed to do ECV (External Cephalic Version) in the ward initially but baby girl inside the tummy decided to descend a stage further to mummy's pelvic hence the plan for ECV failed.

Mummy's diagnosis was changed to Engaged Breech and she was planned for Caesarian section instead. Feeling all nervous as this was her first time having her baby sitting on her pelvic bone rather than the other way around, she can't stop thinking how did it happen and how C-section is gonna be. Albeit feeling anxious, she was willing to answer my strings of questions and was kind enough to give me her permission to do physical examination on her with my tutor. :) #gratitude

The abdominal palpation experience was sure an interesting one. Imagine a baby sitting on a pelvic bone with her lower limbs extended up to mummy's left abdomen and her upper limbs are probably hugging her own self, finding her comfort zone while she lies comfortably under mummy's tummy.
Baby's tiny lower limbs were easily felt that day. Her fetal heart rate was the best thing I ever heard and it was so loud and clear :')

A day after, which was the day she needed to go for C-section, mummy's hubby was finally here to give his best moral support! I know that mummy looked calm on the outside but deep down, she felt nervous as hell. You really can tell by the look of it. Hubby was equally anxious as the wife, needless to say as this can considered as one of the major operations for both of them and also for the little baby who was coming out soon.

As we pushed the stretcher to the general operating theatre, hubby was holding his wife's hands, walking along with the moving stretcher while holding his bag with another hand.
Upon reaching the entrance of the reception bay, one of the staff nurses announced,

"Alright. Both of you can wave goodbye here. Kiss or hug, do whatever you need!" in a joking way.

All of us were stunned for a while and then staff nurse corrected,
"Urmm I meant kiss each other's hands y'know.....", understanding our stunned expression and all of us laughed.

Mummy kissed her hubby's hands, in the meantime giving apology, and the husband did the same.
#thatlovingandsweetmoment
While ticking away the peri-operative checklist in the reception bay, O.T. staff nurse asked,

"So what is the operation that you're going to do today, mummy?"
"Operation of extracting my baby out, nurse." saying it in a darn cool tone.
Everybody laughed again.

I'm amazed by how positive she was at that moment, who still can cracked jokes although she must be feeling extremely jittery inside. I was glad to see her being so optimistic. :)) I prayed hard, for a sucessful operation, for her and her baby girl's safety and health.

As she was wheeled into the room, she sent goodbye kissed to all of us, especially to her husband who was waiting anxiously outside. Every time the door is opened, he would jumped out of his seat to ask about his wife, etc. To be frank, I have never seen anybody (especially husband) so nervous like him (only in movies) but I find it utterly sweet when he constantly asked about his wife although he was acting like he was the one who undergoing the operation but in fact he was just feeling as equally nervous as the wife.
I don't know why but I find #thissolovingandsweet <3

On the following day, I was told that a 2.5 kg baby girl was successfully taken out from mummy's tummy which both mummy and baby girl are safe and sound. #sooooglad
Unfortunately, baby was sent to special care nursery due to hypoglycemia :(
Thankfully, mummy appeared cheerful although baby was not by her side for her to breastfeed.


On the 4th day, baby girl was finally discharged from SCN and admitted to the ward! #woohoo
I did top and tail for her today with the help of my friend. :) Baby girl is sho sho sho cute :> She did not cry a lot when I was cleaning her, just a little wailing when her cord was cleaned using surgical spirit. Haha, otherwise she was all good and well.... cute :>

Since baby girl passed urine and motion, she and her mummy were allowed to discharge! #yays
So I went to talk to her before she was prepared to go back home. We had a little chat about the whole process, from her being admitted to the ward, to C-section, to today, which she was going to discharged with her precious second child. 

She said,

"The operation was quite quick for me. I went in at 12.30pm and came out to the recovery room at 1.45pm. As soon as I was wheeled out from the operating theatre, my husband was relief to see me and our daughter, and good god, he paid more attention to our daughter than me! He can't stop saying how cute our daughter is. Hmmph!"

I grinned for her little complain, yet I find it so sweet, the relationship between all of them. :))

I told her about how her husband went so anxious and worried about her and the baby when she was wheeled into the operating room. Upon hearing, she was touched and thanked God for everything -her husband, her successful C-section, her daughter, etc.

She continued,

"Along the process, I want to thank YOU, girl for always helping me throughout, asking about my concerns and my well being. You are very helpful, hardworking (to ask questions), polite and patient. Please keep it up! Being patient is definitely a golden value that will bring you far in life. Whatever you do, even if you get scolded by anyone, always be patient. Because by being patient, you will be able to go through all the hardships, and the outcome will always be good in the end."

"So thank you, again girl. I appreciate all your kindness and help all this while. I will always pray for your success in your future endeavors. Good luck to you and don't forget to be kind to everyone you meet!"
....
I was beyond thankful for what she said to me. When I was doing what I should be doing, helping people with all I can, with my skills and ability (which to be completely honest), I wasn't hoping for any compliments nor expecting any kind comments like this. 

But having a patient that I nursed from the day I started to work at antenatal/postnatal since Monday until today, seeing the whole process of her from still having her baby bump with a breech presentation to wheeling her to O.T. for C-section to seeing her again at the ward with a compressed stomach and then to the day when she is completely discharged (today), it just feels wonderful. I definitely feel accomplished not by what she said, but being able to nurse her from the beginning until the end.
Y'know the feeling when she wants nobody else but me when it comes to helping and nursing her? I am definitely feeling very privileged and I guess what makes me very glad is that she trusts me. :))


This mummy is thankful for all my assistance and help but you know what, mummy?
Thank YOU for giving me the opportunity, chances, and most importantly, TRUST.
I will always pray for you and your family's well being and if fate permits, we'll definitely meet again. :)

I can't promise (you, mummy) but I'll try to drop by at your Apom Balik's stall (opposite BSN at S2) if I happened to be around the area :D
....................

"Always think positive, girl. Be patient and you'll definitely go far in life."

This is definitely an experience that I am going to remember for a long time. :)


P/S : This is not a bragging/show off post. Rather, I want to be reminded that this is the reason why I still hold into nursing and how it gives me so much satisfaction and accomplishment by simple little things you do to people.
PP/S : I'm glad. I'm really really glad that I chose this. I don't really hope for my posting to end this soon, honestly speaking. Gonna treasure the rest of the days. :))


xx

“Correct yourself first before start correcting others.”

It’s been quite some time… that… I’ve not updated anything about myself, my life and my progress of being an adult here.

Muhh mind says, “It’s time to write something again. It’s time”

………….

Alright (Aussie accent inserted here)

Life’s good so far. With all the learning process going on day by day, it feels awesome. :) Just so you don’t know , I’ve gone through all my class tests on the bloody month of May. Okay, scratch that word bloody, but y’know it was just one of the most horribly stressful months that I’ve been through so far in my study life.  Anyhoo, it’s already the past tense. All I could do is just to hope, to pray very hard and for the best that I can pass and get grades that I deserve to get. (Although I must say I did not do extremely well for certain subjects :[ )
*pat pat and mutters* #alliswell #alliswell

One of my lecturers emphasized this a lot,

“Make full use of your power of observation, where ever you are.”

Observing allows us to notice, hence sense –whether or not our surroundings contain any dangerous elements that may harm us. Observing things carefully could save lives. Observing allows us to learn, from people’s wrong/good doings.. also create a sense of awareness, a source of reminder for us to always be grateful with whatever things that we have. Observing (silently) creates multiple shock/surprises (something that is out of the norms). However, observing make us think things differently, creating wonders and why-questions in our brain. In a way, it will make us understand and sooner we will sort of get ‘used’ to the shock/surprise that we went through earlier on.

"Open your eyes big big."

I’ve been a quite observant person since teenage but I have to admit that I do not utilize it fully. At times, I tend to neglect this little power and god knows, I must have missed a lot of opportunities/events that perhaps could change my life, somehow or rather.

I’ve recently applied this power created by God for us in clinical area. Observing a person’s appearance, behavior, way of doing things, attitude, mode of communication, the way one presents him/herself through way of dressing/talking –create a lot of judgments/ views in my head. Thoughts are running everyday as the power of observation continues. Strangely, all the bad and negative impressions I have had in my head has automatically changed to the good ones and to one point that I learn to understand, eventually gain something valuable in the end.

See how things actually link to each other? Just imagine how things would turn out if we let out/give negative comments about the bad impression that we had without going through the thinking-understanding-and-learning process. The results will certainly turn out to be bad, maybe worse.

As a summary, observe --> judgments -->  think --> understand --> learn  :)

…….

Miss A said,

“To understand your patients, you must know the signs and symptoms. Always observe and ask. When you ask, you will understand and remember.”

Undeniably agree *nods*

Sometimes, these tutors/lecturers’ way of teaching/guiding makes learning experience interesting.

And when she asked,

“Don’t you think that this field is interesting? :) “

*nods again*
Yes, it is. I remember she said that in order to do things that we love,

“Put all our love, interest and curiosities in it. Always ask, and be curious. Make yourself understand and clear.”

I don’t know why, I find this so inspiring. Inspiring to never stop learning, to study not only for the sake of  studying and of course never stop being curious. :)

I have many things, and terms to catch up. Definitely not going to miss any opportunities given during my clinical posting period. :)

I miss uni, I miss events organized by clubs, I miss my friends, and I miss my family. But being the independent me, I often get rid of this ‘miss’ feelings by keeping myself busy, telling myself that I’ll be coming back with a competent, better me.

“Being determined is never hard unless you have the strong desire to achieve the goal.”

So as I’m typing this, it’s already 3.26am, on the 7^th of June 2014.

Signing off from PD,

:) 

As we move on in life..

we noticed a lot of things.


1) The another side of the society.
The brutal, unkind, no courtesy kind of society is what I'm talking about. I've came to a point of realisation that not many of the people you meet, will appreciate what you do/did for them. Maybe they do, but they forget .. easily. And the normal routines go on as usual. Not even a "thank you" after an asked favor is done. Worse is that you get a sour face/bad attitude/SMIRKS in return. *shakes head dissapointingly* Kids nowadays should be taught what manners mean, so that in the future they'll know how important that value is. Adding on, the serious shooting case that is happening, the harsh comments towards each other over some sensitive issues, and the attention seeking people doing something obnoxious in public nowadays.. make me speechless. Well, it's nothing surprising, nothing culture-shocking about the community we are having, it just makes my eyes open wider as someone who is (not really) a newbie in adulthood if you get what I mean.


2) 'Random Act Of Kindness'.
When we are readily to help people whom we know or might not know (strangers), always be prepared for the worse. As in, expect NOTHING in return. Expectations lead to dissapointment MOST.OF.THE.TIME, so do it truthfully from your heart I'd say. But actually, in the process of helping people, we gain happiness, enjoyment and sense of fulfillment that no money in the world can buy. That's even better, right?


3) Friends come and go.
You, me, everybody else will be meeting thousands, countless people in life. Yet as we grow, we realise who our real friends are, those who are trust-worthy, those whom we can count on, those who is/are always there to be our supporting system, and those who are having the same 'channel' (as in interest, the 'click' people usually say) with you. In the process of losing a friend who betrayed/hurt you in some way (maybe that friend of yours once meant a lot to you), in the meantime you'll be friending with a better person who perhaps will replace your 'lost' friend. Well I'm not saying this replaced friend is any better, in the future we wouldn't know what will happen, maybe this friend will do the same/maybe not.. it all depends. To sum it all up, it's pretty hard to find a loyal friend -like one in a million chances. 
(I'm glad that my friends aren't all like that.) 
Oh! On an important note, do NOT treat any of your friends as TRASH.. that's the reason why I see people lose friends so easily. Tsk that's pathetic.

4) Judgements.
This is just too much to talk about.
First off, our youngsters today are often influenced by so called 'JUDGEMENTS' by other people. That's what make them to pretend and act like who they are not. We all know that fame is gained by the number of 'likes', and to compete for that fame, teens are willing to do whatever they can just to gather as much 'likes' as possible to the extend where some of them couldn't stand it and finally commit.... suicide. Ahhh, that is just too much.
I've came across too much miserable people who died just because of JUDGEMENTS. Too much. *shakes head* 
I've learnt that we cannot let the comments to affect us that much. What's right is RIGHT, what's not is totally rationally NOT. Sure, comments come in positive and negative ones. We can take in the positive feedbacks as an inspiration to move forward, whereas the bad feedbacks as an experience/mistake to be better. One thing for sure is, never take harsh reply THAT seriously. In fact some things in life, we just cannot take it to personally deep into our brain, heart, liver.. okay whatever. Expressing yourself in the media world (like facebook and twitter) is good sometimes but ALWAYS know the limits. Angers could be typed out in words, but do not overdo it. Because I've learnt that feelings that we all are experiencing are just temporary. Think about that, it's true.

5) Attitude/Emotions.
As we move on in life.. we all have our own characters/personalities/attitudes/pros and cons. I've realised that people are not a good emotion controller. Not everybody could resist the upset feelings by not crying (especially for girls), nor be patient enough to control the self-anger/self hatred that grow within. It's the norm that most of the people release what they don't wish/want in their mind online. The traditional old diaries have been replaced with blogs, regular tweets or even facebook statuses. Level of privacy is deteriorating, however it's just the way they document their life in this modern, globalisation world. On the other hand, those good ol' human beings who are good in controlling their emotions prefer keeping it to themselves, let those emotions run in their head, process and settle everything in their head. Those, I'd categorize them as the magically good emotion controller. In my world, I'm fortunate enough to have met a few, although I'm not a bad emotion controller, I guess I'm not good enough and this is something that I should learn over and over again.

6) Self egoism vs Jealousy.
Self egoism : Guys always win.
Jealousy : Don't try hard to win this, guys. Girls ALWAYS have the title.


7) Changes.
Time ticks second by second. If you're listening to a song right now, that particular singer could have sung in a pretty graceful way and BAM! Your three minutes are gone -just like that. Maybe after the three minutes, it could turn your upset mood upside down to a happy one. Well.. okay what a bad example but you got what I mean right? Year by year we change.. Embrace the good changes that happened, maintain it or better, improvise! I actually don't get why people are afraid of changes. Probably because they are scared of not being themselves anymore... hey? if you're changing for your own good in terms of characters, without the thought of trying to be somebody else other than yourself, you're heading to the right direction. Don't doubt, and never surround yourself with people who will make you doubt, especially when it concerns about 'self-worth'.

Okay, I think I'm done with this.
These transparent terms I highlighted are something all of us should ponder once in a while.
I'm sure I'll never stop learning as I move on.


P/S : These written words are meant to be my reminders whenever I feel like reading it. :)

Have a lovely Friday, people!

xx

At this point, I am always clueless on what blogtitle I should name, where to begin my blogpost with no title, I think....... I lose my style in blogging...........................or maybe not. Just that I don't blog as frequent as I did last time, hence I am really scratching my head now.

Hahaha, let's be spontaneous shall we?
A few days ago, I spent one day reading - novel (finishing it), online articles, world news via BBC application. I came across this interesting article, which was about 'The 10 Reasons Why No One Knows What They're Doing in Their 20s" by Knowledge For Men. God knows why these knowledges are only for men, are they being gender stereotype? Or it's just a name, really. 
Reason I said it's interesting is the maturity of the content, suitable to be read by everyone at age from 16-20 and above.
It has a lot of agreeable statements like 

1. Life fully in the present. Don’t live to be happy. Be happy while living. Don’t make happiness as the end product of your achievements/goals.
2. Derive happiness from whatever you are doing at present. It is the journey that you must enjoy not the end result. Time is ticking and you will not get it back.
3.  If you truly want to do something, you need to take control of your own life and do it. At the end of the day, it’s your life to live.
4. Instead, surround yourself with people who have qualities you admire, who are smarter and more driven than you. Let their success rub off. Soak up their energy, and let their drive help push you to be better too. And don’t be one-sided about it either—remember that you can positively influence others by encouraging others to be their best selves.
5. You could be spending most of your time climbing a ladder leaned up against the wrong wall (most people do). Just because theirs a ladder presented in front of you doesn’t mean you need to climb it. Go find the right ladder. Go find the ladder destined for you. Find your mission.
6. Your education begins after graduation, not ends.
7. If you want different results tomorrow, do different things today.
8. Your time is going to fly by. Start making it count today. Live with purpose. Live with passion.
9. Success is a product of hard work, not talent. 
10. Negative thinking like “I have no talent” or “I’m not smart enough” is not an excuse for not trying something.
11. Once you’ve started, don’t stop. Fix errors, but don’t quit. You’ve probably tried many things in your life, but you likely haven’t ever committed fully to one for a long period of time. When the goal you’re working on is your life’s true mission, you’ll find it hard to toss aside—the drive inside will tell you to keep going.
12. Stop wasting time filling your life with the things that billion dollar marketing companies tell you that you need, and instead build your days on getting to where you want to be.

Words worth reading. Thoughts worth absorbing into the brain.
At times, we tend to be too focused on people's personal lives, and we, the young people, the adults - neglect the roles we are supposed to have. Definitely not online-stalking, gaming, online-dating and stuffs like that, it's the role in becoming a better person each day, working hard towards our life goals with passion and positive spirits.

Thus far, this is a piece of article that I find one of the most sensible and it's a good wake up call to those who are still well you know, daydreaming.
....


(Let's talk about movies!)
Approximately less than 6 days ago, I've watched a French (wow) movie, recommended by a friend of mine.

The Intouchables : 4.2/5.0 (trailer)
This movie doesn't really have an obvious lesson like how other movies are heavily emphasised. The moral lessons are widespread in different scenes, so it's quite hard to conclude all together to form one life lesson. On a poster, however has a beautiful statement,

'Sometimes you have to reach in to someone else's world to find what's missing in your own. '

So true right?
It somehow reminds me of being a volunteer, how I want myself to involve more in jobs that can help people who are homeless, people who are disable, orphans, old people or volunteering activities that are beneficial to the society. Having a vast experience not to mention building up a better character and leadership in self by lending them a hand, interacting with them will make me comprehend them more. I'm sure it's helpful and it definitely will bring good outcomes for my career in the future. Really really want to do this, not only by myself, perhaps tying some good ol' friends along, following behind me, hahaha #hopefully #hopefully

Speaking of movie with similar genre like this, I'd recommend you guys to watch

The Impossible : 4.9/5.0
In this movie, there is hardly any funny elements in it, so don't expect to laugh or whatsoever. It's pretty suspenseful and thrilling though. Prepare some tissue papers just incase you are going to tear in the end of the movie. (Advice for girls only)
Watch the trailer HERE :)

Both of these movies have won some international awards, which I didn't know until I googled about it. Good ratings from rottentomatoes, great reviews from viewers, all in all, good feedbacks for both.
It's not going to dissapoint, I gurantee :)

....
(complain time! Please bear with me :/ )

After months of rotting, I'm back to driving lessons again. Eh wait, it's not like I hire the instructor to teach me and go through the tests all over again hell NO. My siblings and parents are my instructors these few months. To say I am a good driver now, that would rather be an understatement because I haven't reached the 'pemandu berhemat' type of driver YET. Got myself into a very minor accident that day, thankfully everything was fine.. just that.......thecarwashavingaheartachetime so as my papa, oh my shitty hell I swear that moment was damn shitty. /tears/ 
Occasionally, I find myself very very dumb for not mastering the back parking at ONE time. I lost count how many times my mum actually taught me patiently, reversing, adjusting, wheeling the stereng, one step by one step, until I managed to finally back parking by myself at the end of the lesson. Good god, Mama thank you for being so patient towards your silly daughter who is unconfident in driving (you know why if you read my posts last time with label 'driving'). No one, I mean no one other than you have so remarkably good temper when it comes to this. :')

Anyhoo, my driving skills ain't very good YET, still shitty and I haven't got a pass from the best driver at my house, the you know who. Gahhh how I wish driving is as easy as cooking. Hahaha totally unrelated but oh well..

That day, Mama written a note, which sounds like this :

"Adik, you kena kuat bersabar. Tabah berusaha. Show mum good news."

I totally understand the message she's trying to send.. the thoughts is what that counts. (Just fyi, my mum isn't someone who writes BM often.) With what you've written, Mama I'm proud of you! And I'll always remember what you said, with all my efforts and prayers, please let me master driving as quick as possible pleaseeeeeee
Thank you, Mama for always being there :') #grateful
....

Lately, it hits me again that "being strong" ain't as easy as I thought. It never is easy. Said and done are very different as 'said' fades, whereas 'done' takes hella long time to be proven. So who said it's not difficult?
Really can't figure out why the self-weakness seems like coming back again - being unconfident, being blur, being dumb, being not aware enough. It's stressful sometimes.

Be serious and use your bloody brain, self.


On a brighter note, I finished reading Twenties Girl by Sophie Kinsella two days ago. :) It was a nice book for a good laugh, suspenseful in the beginning and ended up okay. Keep it up the good job in creating the suspense in every chapter of each of your book, Sophie! Love it :)

And, a short film called, "The Butterfly Circus" kinda turned my perspective upside down once again. What being/feeling unconfident, blur, dumb before this are all bullsh*t. Stop feeling so negative, start improving yourself instead!

NOTHING is impossible, self.

It's the lesson from the film btw. Watch it. I highly recommend :)

Look, I'm supposed to be on bed now. (Pardon the spelling and grammar mistakes)
I seriously don't know what to name my blogpost hence I'll leave it untitled yeah?
Haha, till then.


Goodnight love!

Be my Sun, and I'll be your Moon ;

The Moon That Embraces The Sun.
4.5/5.0

This particular Korean drama.. has brought me to the sea of Koreandramaaddictedfansagain after SO LONG! Hahaha, I find this drama sweet no matter in actions or words that's why it brought me all the way to the ending within 3 days as I watched the rest of the episodes online. First thing first, the episodes show at 8tv are way too slow. :P Imagine we have only 5 weekdays a week, 5 episodes a week, how is that not slow? Secondly, this drama PARTICULARLY will always leave the suspense at the end of each episode, which always made me goes from o_o to what?! this is it? how could that be? Haha, drama y'know.

A lot of humour are being inserted in this drama, so don't have to worry, you'll smile eventually when you watch certain parts of the story. Not to mention, it is also a touching drama as well. It shows a lot of kinship, betrayal, selfishness, greed, sacrifice, fate, love, hardships, karma, intelligence and justice.
I've learnt that people who are greedy and materialistic, would sacrifice anything to get things/positions that they want, which includes abandoning the importance of family and sacrificing those unwanted life. Don't ever practice this in life because in the end, these people will lose everything they have gained in the first place.

I quote the drama,
"In order to succeed, you'll gain something, yet at the same time lose something." Gaining brings us happiness, while losing brings us depression. Life is always fair. 

The main male character who is the King (the Sun) potrays a good set of characteristics (intelligent, wise and fair) which kind of suprised me because, he has made a tough decision to punish his Royal family members who loved him, but at the same time hurted him by committed a very heavy crime. The conflicts in dealing this matter is really heartbreaking. To choose justice or kinship? The feeling of being betrayed by your loved ones is really really painful. :( Plus, he was a lonely Prince when he was young, no one was there for him when he needed someone, this actually reminded me of something in my life somehow.. .. . :)
(At last he [The King] made a wise decision, which I'm glad. :) Proud of his decision!)

In another sentimental side of the drama, fate eventually brought the true lovers together in the end, no matter how many disagreements, difficulties, and life-to-death incidents they have faced. It's always like this isn't it? As long as the couples have faith towards each other, no matter where they are, their hearts always beat together as one. :)
Another thing about this drama is, I admire the sweet pickup lines, which were simple, yet beautiful.
1) "Because I am next to the Sun, I don't need any other light."
2) "I wanted to give it (phoenix hairpin) to you when I asked you to become my moon, as a token of my love when I asked you to marry me."
3) "What I want to give you is something that nothing in the world can be exchanged for it. In the world, the one and only.. me." :)

(This is a sad song, it touched me. :') Wish I can play it by piano someday)

I like the middle part of the story because it is exciting! After knowing the truth, I started to get a little bit bored but the drama ended the story by showing some romantic actions by the King towards the Queen. Too sweet until I can melt, anytime. x) IF that ever happens in real life, haha.
Anyhoo, I quote shaman Wol / Yeon Woo (the main female character, the Moon/Queen),

"No hardships are meaningless. Every hardship given by God has its deeper meanings."

It's true and meaningful. 

Campbell's point of views ;

"You don't love someone because they're perfect," she says. "You love them in spite of the fact that they're not."

I don't know how to respond to that; it's like being told after thirty-five years that the sky, which I've seen as a brilliant blue, is in fact rather green.

"And another thing- this time, you don't get to leave me. I'm going to leave you."

If possible, that only makes me feel worse. I try to pretend it doesn't hurt, but I don't have the energy. "So go."

Julia settles next to me. "I will." she says. "In another fifty or sixty years."


-My Sister's Keeper.

Mixed hi ;

Hi?

I'm alive. So much alive. Guess what it's the twenty first of January two thousand and thirteen. January's gonna end in another 10 more days and I'm getting my results tomorrow. Heh. That's my whole point, isn't it?

Well, well life. What have I been doing?
Not much actually. Just chores.sleep.morningjog.universityresearch.photoupload.read.clean.meetupwithhighschoolfriends.happinessprojects.relaxinglife.
Yeah, as you can see, nothing big there just very minimal things that people do.
FYI, I've been sort of like grounded to be at home, which explains the reason I couldn't hangout much with friends, and it's a way of saving money, y'know.
Oh wait, I haven't tell you guys about my working days, experience and life! ComingsoonIpromise. ComingsoonIpromise. :D

By the way, I- the owner of this blog, salute those who actually scrolled, and read every single words that I typed here about my bittersweet happenings in 2012. I from the bottom of my heart thank YOU. :)
Speaking of blogging, it's the second post of the new year -2013. Pardon my lack of enthusiasm in the previous post, I have a lot to stories in mind to blog it out here but I.. never actually find a proper time, sitting like how I'm doing right now, blogging my hearts out about my rants and most of it is my thoughts. Partly because, I spent most time doing research instead of carrying out too much relaxing activities. Ughh the pressure. Only the closed ones will understand why I mentioned pressure.

Every year, I'll create a resolution list for self to accomplish, but looking back at what I did in 2012.. maybe I failed to be/do what I planned but in another way, I might have become a better person in another perspective that I did not intentionally plan. That's good, isn't it? :)

As we are growing up, (MENTALLY), I think resolutions don't always have to be early of the year, it could be the starting of the week, early of the month, or perhaps early of the day - as early as you wake up from sleep. :) Resolutions of the year could mean, things that you wish to accomplish in long term, hopefully you'll see yourself improve or achieve things that you want to do but I'd say, if you have the time to do it right now, do it. Don't waste too much time wasting too much opportunities out there, maybe you can achieve something bigger or perhaps gain more experience in life that you - yourself don't expect or imagine!
That's what I learnt and it's crucial, y'know. Every second counts now! Even reading this piece of article. :P

I guess this applies/is the same as appreciating people around you. Life is short, yes it's true. We don't know what might happened to us in the next few seconds. War, riots, disasters, diseases, instant death out of no reasons.. - I learnt to be more appreciative as a person, a more loving girl who tends to spread love to people, in the form of words or actions. I don't know how to describe, it's like..that immediate happiness you get to whenever you -cheer people up -make their day better -make them smile. It's just feels nice to be a person who is able to change one person, but well what more to inspire them. And.. I believe in karma. What goes around definitely comes around. How people treat me is how I treat back to them. 

My principle always goes like this ;
1) If you're being good/kind to me, I'll be extra/even more kind to you. More than you can imagine.
2) If you're being bad to me, I'll not do the same. I believe one day, karma will help me do the rest. :)

So be nice to every people you meet.
As the saying goes, "Treat people how you want people to treat you back."

Ahhh wait. How come I'm talking about this? *pat self
Hahahaha.
I don't wish to post any self-resolutions here, as in those I-wish-I-can-be-more-this-and-that-etc-kind-of-list, I think it should be better if I keep that to myself. :)
What I personally wish to accomplish by this year is to master some skills. :P Well here's what

• Driving.
  Damn. This. has been. one. of. my. heh.notgoingtorevealhere. since the last day I drove. Oh well.
  
• Cooking and baking.
  THIS. I've left my passion in cooking since last year's college break? Hahaha. Gonna catch up and find back the passion one day and MASTER it. :P
  
• Make up.
  THIS. Hehehe. Well it's part of life that a girl should know, isn't it? I shalln't further eleborate about this. Kbai.
  
• Dancing/Physical exercise?
  This is crazy, I mean. Dance, PK? Hell you must be crazy. But this is part of my wish-to-do this year if I mean IF I get to go for any dancing class in university later? Idk, it's just part of my plans and... hehehe. :D
  
• Eye contact.
  HA THIS. When I get supersuperSUPER shy, I'll lose my eye contact with someone. I'll look at somewhere else instead to hide my pinkrosycheeks or perhaps any embarassment/mistakes that I made. Eeek. (")(") But well, I'll need to learn, to have a thicker skin, act cool and blehh better eye-contact la what else. (")(")
  
• Photography.
  A definite category that I must mention. I improved so much since last year and I'm going to make myself even better in this field. :)
  
• Housework/chores.
  Ridiculous, I know. C'mon, what the hell skills you need in this? Well, what I meant is to carry out the chores as fast as I can in a short time. And being called as professional in house chores is such a pleasure y'know. HAHAHAHA. Such pk.
  
• Read.
  Recently, I've gained back my long lost reading habit and HELL YEAH. I like it! (uh-huh-uh-huh) :D Gonna read as much as possible, and gonna train my speed reading. Made some goals for myself actually. 10 books in a year. Possible? More than possible right? I think I should increase the number of books I should read.. .. .... hmmmmm. *figures
  
• Money management.
  Oh this. I've been spent too much back at college. :( So I must control my expenditure this time, spend very very very wisely. Before I purchase any worthy items, I better check the price tag first, think a thousand million times before I hand my cash to the cashier. Hukhukhuk. :'( I wish I am rich. *ungrateful cries*
  
• Volunteer.
  It is always a pleasure, to contribute to the society, to be able to help people around you. Yes, I wish and I hope I can volunteer more this year. :)

Of course, above all this, I wish I can be a better person -more disciplined, more hardworking, more systematic, more wise and blablabla. Hahaha, like I said, it's better for my ownself to know where my limits are and if possible, I want to go beyond that. :)

It's time for dinner.
I shall... urm go?


BYE PEEPS I LOVE Y'ALL MWAHHHH. *throws kisses

Errr Happy belated 2013?

You gotta be good good good! :)

Dear you,

Credits to whoever said this. God bless you.