January. I still remember vividly that I was so overwhelmed and exhausted by the mountains of assignments being thrown to me and my batchmates during semester 5. I remember being so task oriented that I almost neglected the human values during my clinical assessments. Of course, I was ultra thankful to my assessors who pin pointed my little mistakes here and there. Human values and the true essence of communication cannot be forgotten whether we are having exam or not. Patients' safety can never be compromised, patients' comfort must always be our top priority.#lifelessonlearnt I guess the best feeling of the month was to hand in all the twenty-one (yeap you did not hear that wrong) assignments at one go. The relief, the happiness, the off burden, the jumping in circles moment. Imagine me in that situation. #feelingblissful Anyway, I kinda ended that month with a blast presentation and karaoke after that. You guys can never ever imagine (my friends and) me swearing I mean singing out loud with 'vulgar' lyrics on the screen using a microphone to the point the passersbys were staring at us, lulz. I mean... it was tension release purposes, no serious harm was intended. /cry-laugh emoji/ February. If Chinese New Year did not fall on January, it must be somewhere on February. So yeah, this year the CNY was on my birthday month, and coincidentally again, my birthday was on the third day of CNY this year, woohoo. Double angpows (woohoo!) And GSC was kind enough to give me free movie tickets but wasn't kind enough to add more interesting movies for me to watch. FYI, birthday person can only watch a certain movies in that 'arterisk' list. Obviously not impressed because at that time, there were a lot of horror movies in the list and also local-CNY-I have already watched movies. But THANKFULLY, THANKFULLY Deadpool was in the list. Watched with dearest Ying. And THANKFULLY, the movie was quite hilarious. Thanks Ryan Reynolds for the good job done! Still cannot beat my favourite 'Ant Man', nonetheless! :P ... Received my result, it was SURPRISINGLY okay, hahaha I have always thought I scored worse but oh wells :) As usual, my university wouldn't give anything more than 3 weeks of semester break. SO classes resumed on the 29th of Feb. YEP. March. First class was on stress threshold and mental illnesses for Mental Health module. It was purrrrrretty fun. Everybody started to suspect each other whether any of us have some kind of mental disorders. lulz Oh yeah, not to mention, beginning of semester 6 means the BEGINNING OF RESEARCH, face that SELF! /exhale slowly/ I think I probably will have a blogpost specially dedicated to 'research' SOON to commemorate my journey with my supervisor. Such a tough asdfghjklqwertyuiop.. okay I'll leave it for future blogpost. Wait for it. And oh, I've been to the Putrajaya Hot Air Balloon Fiesta again! This time with a bunch of good friends until late night. It was a pretty fun night, I remember. Also, I received a lovely photo album from my buddy that month. <3 April, May, June. After some mini battles with le exam papers, we headed to Tanjung Rambutan for our first posting at Hospital Bahagia Ulu Kinta (HBUK). Very exciting! Our first mental health posting was definitely an eye-opening experience one. And then healthy ageing posting at Alzheimer's Disease Foundation Malaysia, management posting at T-ung S-hin (TS) Hospital and community posting at KK Pedas. These three months had been quite impactful. For more stories on my posting experience, it has been blogged here.
P/S : Oh yah, in the midst of posting, we also travelled to Ipoh and around Seremban for the food and some sightseeing! I will miss the morning stroll around Rasah neighbourhood. :') July. It was the month of gathering. Gathering who? Gathering with my best friend (Alia), with my dear high school friends during Raya and of course, with my piggie gang! One of my college buddies had graduated from UCSI, hence another gathering! Congrats over your convocation, buddy. Now that you're entering workforce pretty soon, I'm wishing you the best of luck and rock the working world under your toes! ... It was also a month of saying goodbye to my dear friend, Ray (all the best in UK, pal!) and my dear lecturers - Prof L and Ms. Pat. They are one of the few who are very good at what they're teaching. Knowing that they have retired and left to another place of teaching, I will miss them both very much. FAST FORWARD to... end of the month. I landed at Myanmar. August. There are too many words to describe Myanmar. I was there for 11 days with a group of volunteers for a community project called 'MICCP' aka Myanmar-IMU Collaborative Community Project. First of all, knowing that I was approved to FLY after some 4 donkey years staying at Malaysia, I was obviously overjoyed. Secretly speaking, I was very thrilled and excited throughout my journey (without my family for the first time), hahaha. Truth be told, I enjoyed every seconds whenever I was at Myanmar. :) All the 'tuk-tuk' moment, the honking days and nights, the interaction with the people at Myanmar, the taste of the culture and food, the beautiful kids, places like Mandalay, POL and Bagan... I can't wait to write about this experience soon. Wait for it k. (after my exam on the first week of January, pinky promise). So after 11 good ol' days being at Myanmar, I was having post-I-miss-Myanmar-syndrome. BUT I was really glad that I took a handful of photos and videos. Viewing and replaying those shots played back those great memories. :') It was my first time editing a couple of videos within the same month. It was up at my vimeo account. Gocheckitout! Link. 29 Aug 2016: Semester 7 started.
September. Semester 7 was jam packed. Can you believe it when I say I have only two weeks of theory block (meaning attending lectures and classes)?? CANYOU?
I kenot, myself. Even though I only need to study for two subjects, but it was packed with deadlines of assignments and studies within that two weeks. BLARDYHELL. It was clearly stressful lah, but then it's over so it's okayyyyy. Anyhoo, IMU Cup began again. I went with a bold face covered the dance event using a super limited equipment under the limited light situation. No flash, no DSLR, high ISO, moving dance, crazy lighting. BOOM. It was an eye-straining editing that's fo sho' but I took it as my learning experience. I was utterly dissapointed that I did not deliver some good shots for the dancers dass all. :[ Moving on, I participated Chariofare Run for my 3rd year with dear Prissy. Timed self, had improvement but just slightly. Sobssss but it was more smooth and fun running this time compared to the previous year's probably because I knew the route therefore I can roughly estimate how long did I still have to reach the finishing line. And then I was the photog again after the run. Special thanks to Ms. S for having the faith in me again. :)) In the meantime, as soon as my theory block ended, my Non-Nursing elective began! What's that, you wonder? It's a module which I can participate in any community projects/work/attempt something new OUT of nursing. Meaning I can learn how to cook, drive, swim, work with a photographer, etc. BUT the funny thing is, when you are writing your report, you have to relate how joining (whatever that you're participating) will benefit you in nursing. :/ So much hmmmphs. I wanted to join community projects super badly, which include Epic Homes, Litre of Lights, SPCA and many more but I took quite some time to consider it because IMU JC presentation fell on the same month. In the end, I kinda gave up my plan and go for something more relaxing and near to uni. That is.... ... ... .. .. . drum roll please . .. .. ... ... ..... ...... ..................yoga. *cheers* I have always wanted to learn yoga since young, since this was a good opportunity, I went for 12 classes and 3 workshops! Needless to say, I was superrrrr grateful for such a patient and dedicated yoga instructor who gave lotsa encouragement to her students. I have learnt quite a number of yoga poses which I never expect that I can do - such as crow pose, hand stand, etc but all thanks to her, I can. I really can, with the help of a friend of course. :) But hearing her telling me,
"You improved so much in just 12 classes!"
made me smile from ear to another.
Learning yoga has been a smart choice, I'd say. I saved a lot of time and get to relax MORE after a series of stressful days. It increased my physical flexibility and improved my muscle strength too. I can FEEL IT y'know. Sho' amazing. :] ...And then, and then there was this IMU JC Presentation at the end of the month. Both Ms. TT and I were nervous but well prepared. THANKFULLY, nobody shoot us any questions, woohoo. I can see that my supervisor was more happy than I was. lol! Haha but ah well, I can never reach to this point without her so...major credits to her. (Y) Shortly after the horrific presentation, classmates and I headed to Meeples Board Game Cafe to play some indoor board games. It was pretty fun and exciting day, spending hours playing and just chillaxing. I love it! September was so happening I see. So it ended with a farewell dinner with dear Ying and Chee Ling. October. Yoga was still ongoing, although non-nursing elective was finished in mid-Oct. Research was still ongoing because it is never-ending until you printed that book with gold prints. In the middle of all this, my clinical posting at HP (Hospital Pantai) KL officially began. This time round, we went to (Paeds, O&G, Respi and Diabetic) clinics and out patient department such as Dialysis centre to deliver health teaching to the clients there. Some of us were tagged with a wound care/colostomy staff nurse who goes to all wards to do wound inspection, dressing and colostomy related procedures. Well to be honest, I'd say that the experience at a private healthcare setting sure was different than the experience I had in government health care setting. Lunch was always expensive and the access/permission to give health teaching wasn't as free and easy as I thought. Another thing is, 4 weeks of posting was too long. On my 3rd and 4th week, I felt draggy. So yah. But on a positive note, I did meet a couple of nice people who were so willing to say yes and really showed sincere appreciation whenever we had done the health education. :) P/S: I miss the loving K & K (siblings) at Paeds clinic. November. DING DING DING! I am officially an aunt to my sister's son, everyone! This Baby Bryan Lee arrived in the morning of 3rd November, looking like a little caterpillar. /heart shaped eyes/ Grandma and Chris came over from Aussie to visit families here. We had a couple of family gatherings here and there. Time spent with them was always so joyful. :)) Besides reuniting with fam bam, research data collection also commenced! I was grateful for Ms. H's assistance during my data collection period. The process was tedious and tiring but I will take it as my learning process. Afterall, it's part of a research journey. Andddddddd IMU Cup closing ceremony wrapped up the IMU Cup this year. Photographed and uploaded those photos at Facebook. I left a video to edit but I haven't touched ittttt. Yikes. Soon, soon! Besides, I have also covered IMU Convo for my seniors and friends who graduated this year. Congrats, guys! My turn will come soon.
December. This month was nothing but full of typing. Research data analysis, Chapter 5, thesis writing, blogging, instagram thought posting, etc. Besides academic related, I have also started my happiness project (again) since November. Pinned down some creative ideas at Pinterest and made some DIY hearty cards for random people. :) Occasionally when I was over-stressed with research, I took a day off to window shop/real shop. It's another self discovery process on traveling, renewing things I like, choosing to spend wisely rather than buy recklessly, enjoying the freedom and quality 'me' time.. I gotta say, I love it! ... December is another lovable month because it is the rainy season! Woot woot. My room have never been cooling since ages and now when it rains everyday, my room feels like heaven. ...On another note, I have (recently) joined another local community project at the heart of KL. It's called the TMC. It's basically a project led by Dr. M which a group of volunteers (doctors, pharmacist, students, any random volunteers) gather to give free medical aids to the homeless and urban poor people. I have joined the team twice so far and I would love to join more whenever I can. :))
So to sum up my life in the year of 2016, giving back to community is my main highlight of the year. No matter to people who are unwell physically and mentally, people who are disabled, people who have organic disorder, people who are poor/homeless/transgender, and people of different race/ethnicity. Interacting with people of different family, social, and cultural background makes me feel grateful and learn a lot as a person. Most importantly, it keeps me inspired. :) Now, enough about me. Apart from my life, news around the world this year involved war, terrorism, world election, and the world olympics. Full of joy yet so much despair. Great icons passed away, celebrities couple splitted, the increasing of keyboard warriors and judgmental society and the misuse of social medias for the wrong purpose.. 2016 has certainly teared our heart apart in some ways, donchu think? But fret not, I am certain that this is a test that we all will overcome. Let's start reminding each other to be kind to one another, stay true to yourself, embrace your flaws just as they are, and remember to spread love to people around you and to people all over the world.
--- Overall, I wouldn't say 2016 is my best-est year of all, but I'd say it is rather an unforgettable year. I did not achieve as much as I did the previous year but I'd say there are many highlights and money cannot buy experiences that will always serve as a reminder to me to be forever grateful in life. Definitely make a lot of people smile, this year. Super glad that I fulfilled my own promise (personal resolutions) that I made last year. :D
In 2017, Plans and hopes : -Unfollow negative people -Launch a new profile to spread positive words around -Face own fears. -Create more self acheivements. -READ MORE BOOKS AIYO. I did not reach much in 2016. :( -Healthy and safe, always. -Happy, happy all the time. -Make more people smile. -Contribute more, spread more love, expand the expanded #happinessproject! -More adventures, more new attempts. But in all seriousness, 2017 is gonna be an epic, challenging yet exciting year. Rooster is coming in when Monkey is exiting according to Chinese calendar. So it's gonna be MY YEAR. :P Whatever it is,
BRING IT ON, NEW YEAR!
*clinks glasses* *fireworks*
Happy blessed 2017 to all of you out there and to YOU who are reading this. Here's to a greater, safer and healthy year ahead. :) Always remember to be kind everyday, peepo! xx
Sometime in April, May and June, I had my semester 6 posting at a few specialty places. It was one of a kind and unforgettable. Now let me tell you my story. 1. Our first stop was to Tanjung Rambutan, at Hospital Bahagia Ulu Kinta (HBUK). It was for our mental health (module) posting. We've been to... -the psycho-geriatric ward -the normal ward (Ward 2 & 3) -rehabilitation wards (Ward 7 & 8) -the ECT (electroconvulsive therapy) room -the library and -the centre where the recovering patients actually WORK - making handicrafts for visitors, assembling flowers, tailoring and so much more. They are actually trained to adapt to the working life when they are discharged later. When I mentioned that they are TRAINED, each of them has a punch card and respective off day just like a normal worker. /impressed/ I have bought some souvenirs from the centre because hands down, all the handicrafts were really impressive!
There were a few dramas during our time being posted there. A few hurdles rose, it kinda shook each of us as the drama was nothing small but a dang serious thing that all of us cannot forget. Nevertheless, I was so glad that we went through together as a team, never pointed fingers to anyone, instead solved it together as one. :) When we were there, we stayed at the hostel situated a kilometer away from the hospital. Speaking of THAT, I shared a room with my dear (P)s - Prissy and Pau and we sort of had a blast sleeping and giggling together every night. HAHAHAHA. I can never forget the 'bugs' moment, 'cats, cats everywhere' conversation, 'omg it is lizard!' situation, the scorching heat days, the 'shit smell' story during one of those midnights, my burnt fan story, and those nights when we practised (our Hokey Pokey dance) for the 'party' on the last day of our posting! lulz. Such great memories, man. But what really left an impact on me was a few touching moments that we had gained during our posting experience. One of patients there actually handwritten us a letter in Mandarin Chinese, to thank our company and presence. I mean... we were only in each designated ward for a couple of days and all we did was just talking, spending time doing activities with them and doing nothing much, really. To the point that we were appreciated is just :').
Actually to be honest, seeing patients laughed happily and seeing them changed from being quiet to engage themselves with us in most of the activities was one of our best accomplishments! However, reading patients' documents on their past history and hearing them telling us made me feel very upset. Broken relationships, abandoned family, inability to cope with stress, and their frequent questions to us, "Where are my children?" and "When can I go home?" really teared the inner me apart. I was also shocked to see those mentally ill patients who are placed at the psychogeriatric wards. Some of the shocking habits (I wish not to disclose here) were very depressing and these two words 'human values' really striked me bad and I have reflected so much from it. But one definite lesson that I have learnt was, "Each of the patient there despite having mental illness deserves to receive all the human rights, respect, nonjudgmental comments and treatments. We all (regardless whether we are healthcare providers or just simple human being) have to always be empathy, sensible, wise, fair and sensitive. Be a human being to another human being." I will on and off read back this invaluable thought and remind myself to be grateful, to be all of the above said. ...On the last day, after the party that we organised for the patients, I was quite reluctant to leave but I guess two weeks was impactful enough to let me learn. The only shame part was that we did not get to go to any of the admission wards, that is the Wad Kemasukan Lelaki/Perempuan. Cuz' we were told that there were more acute cases that we can see there. Oh wells, no luck for us then. 14 days but so much of memories. __ 2. Second stop was at Petaling Jaya - Alzheimer's Disease Foundation Malaysia. We had our Healthy Ageing (module) posting at there. No doubt, it was another memorable posting that I shared with my classmates.
Basically, what we did there was quite routinised. The morning was started off with 'brain-gym exercise', then followed by morning breakfast for the clients, then karaoke session and arts and crafts session until lunch. After lunch there will be interactive games planned by the ADFM staffs for all the clients to spend their time in the afternoon while they wait for their loved ones to fetch them back from the centre. Looking at the display at the memorial wall, I was impressed by the handicrafts that the Alzheimer clients made during arts and craft session. So artistic and creative I give them all a thumbs up! We were there for two weeks -in which we mainly observed during the first day of posting, then subsequently (slowly) taking over from the staffs to organize the activities by our own. We did not adjust/alter much (just change some content of) the routinised activities (slightly) because it might cause confusion especially for those clients with Alzheimer's disease. .. Truth be told, it was one of the most relaxing postings I have ever had. Spending time interacting with the clients made me happy. I still remember encouraging Mr. W in one of those A&C sessions because he was feeling quite timid and low self esteem at first. But with constant motivation and support, I was glad to have boosted up his self confidence that he was all smiling from ear to ear after his 3D (DIY) dinosaur, "Long Life" (he named it himself) was properly done. Shortly after that, he invited me for a dance during one of those karaoke sessions, lol. I was taken aback but at the same time I was genuinely touched for such gesture. :') This 'bravo' client has wonderful smile, sings beautifully and he was one of those inspiring people I met whom I won't forget.
And to conclude this posting, a major thanks to all the ADFM staffs for being so nice, friendly and accommodating. All of you have such caring heart yourselves, please keep it up the excellent job and may God bless you all always. :) People often ask me, "So when you were talking to people with Alzheimer's, they often forget what they did/say thus they always repeat, don't they?" Yes. They forget, thus we are there to remind them, to care for them. Caring for people with Alzheimer's is not easy but think back how your parents took care of you when you were young, that's how exactly we should take care of them. They might be forgetful, misplaced things, clumsy, hard to please, but with patience, compassion and great amount of love, you will get through this. Get a respite care when you need, take a break when you're tired. Also, don't forget to offer your hugs and kissed to your loved ones (although they have Alzheimer's disease)! It is an important physical affection, they will feel happy just like us normal human beings. We feel loved whenever our dear ones gave us a touch/hug/kiss, don't we? :)
"Although they can never remember what we did to them, they certainly will not forget how we made them feel." :) :)
These are some of the lessons I have learnt through a 'Alzheimer's disease-caregiver' talk and also during this posting. __ 3. Next up, Management posting. One word : Stressful. Super, super stressful actually. Having to juggle between workload (research, incidental-reflective writings), tasks (Team leader, medication nurse, runner), coping with functional nursing, work shifts, tiredness, long distance travel... those days surely weren't easy. BUT the interesting part of the posting was surprisingly the night shifts days. Hahaha! I must declare that I was one of those who didn't drink a sip of coffee yet survived those wee-and-dawn hours with so much style and pride. #shamelessconfessionhere Oh well, it was an experience but I am not too sure whether I can cope in the near future. Imagine night shift today, then afternoon shift the next day, etc? And another incidence I will not forget is definitely 'Dexamethasone 1mg.' Please remember forever, pk. Also, I'd like to thank some of the staffs there who taught me patiently on how TS Hospital actually works in terms of management and also C.I. for giving me good input for nursing tasks such as passing over report. Despite the struggles that we went through, I still thank YOU olls. :) ___ 4. Klinik Kesihatan Pedas is next! *woots* Actually I wasn't expecting a lot for this posting because I had no time to expect to be honest. Hahaha but going back to Seremban feels great. That was my last time staying at Bukit Rasah at Uncle D's. Last time intruding clinical school like nobody's business and last time being member of the Rasah neighbourhood! :) Community posting was surprisinglyfun for me. We started off with school visits and clerking pregnant mummies as well as kids in the first week. It was my first time giving vaccines (MR and DT) to school children. Albeit feeling super nervous, surely it was a cool experience. :)) Subsequently we went for home visits for antenatal and postnatal cases. Pedas is situated near to Rembau, a small town not far away but houses around are made of wood and this small town has a lot of 'kampung' feel which I lovelovelove.
So during home visits, we clerked the patient, checked on the babies, did some anthropometric measurements, updating mum and child's progress in the very important (pink and blue) book that every mum and child suppose to have. On the last week of this posting, we also did a 'mopping' session, meaning we traveled to houses to enquire the families on the updated immunisation status of their children. As you all knew, diphtheria cases went viral due to parents refused to vaccinate the child last July. "Vaccinations are very important, dear parents. Bring your children to the nearest clinic to get the jab if any of them missed a dose/hasn't taken any vaccines before! Please have a thought about it, it is always better be safe than sorry." ...Back to the story, during the 'mopping' session, we went visit houses near the estates and railway track. Along the journey, we met some friendly chickens, running goat, a family of dogs, cute kittens , a unique duck, an active squirrel and many many palm trees! Ahh the 'kampung' feel. Love, love!
Hands down again, this is definitely one of the best postings that I will not forget! Special thanks to all the KKIA staffs for being so amazing and patience in teaching us the proper way of clerking pregnant mums and kids. Thanks to Mdm L and Pn K for always encouraging us to try and do a lot of hands on. FYI, community nurses are very EMPOWERED and basically they are the ones who run the clinic, other than the other healthcare providers like DUH. /proud/ Also, I will not forget the good times I had together lunching and decorating the 'breastfeeding' room with my classmates. :)
Such a memorable posting. That's all for this post. Till then, y'all! xx
Hellow fellow readers! Semester 6 nursing student reporting here, feeling demotivated since Saturday (yesterday) and tomorrow (Monday) is gonna arrive. Soon. :O
Nuuuuuuuu, as the blog title speaks it all, motivation seems like it is finding its way to hide at a deepest hole which I can't find and here I am, blogging how I feel right now #yikes Anyhoo, I am on SNAPCHAT WOOHOOOOOOO NOT. HAHAHAHA butbutbut no lens filters for dear iPad mini though. #sobs I started my first few posts today with a black background featuring some #nowplaying songs. (inspired by Ah hui's) Hahaha if lens filters exist, I'd have played with it but meh it's not available.... it's alright then. :( I'll switch to "spam my followers with #nowplaying 10s" playlist. (I bet they're gonna be annoyed, like SO annoyed. LOL) Here's a thing about snapchat. It is fun, yet it could be very pointless at the same time especially when we are bored. I hope it won't turn out to be a distraction to me because the reason I created snapchat isn't to distract myself, obviously. By the way, (switching to uni life updates) my research year has begun (hooooraaaaaayyyy NOT). I've chosen a topic, now doing chapter 1, ONLY chapter 1 and I am half dying, like literally#deadfish The hassles and the trouble of finding and reading many many many articles. Ugh, I salute those who really has passion in research (like my research supervisor!) Whenever I wanted to sigh (so much) that I failed to do this (for instances finding articles) and that, somehow she will brighten up my day with sparkling ideas, beautiful smile and her sparkling enthusiasm. Yeah, basically, she's always so sparkling and it is truly inspiring! (I wish I have her 'sparkling' character :)) ) Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaih-wait no. Stop sighing. Don't let 'research' alone to defeat you so easily, PK. You are stronger and better than you think. Just because research is more 'powerful' and more 'knowledgeable' than you doesn't mean you're gonna give up and sigh all the way, ya? "Step by step. Know your own pace and do your best in every step you take!"💪💪💪 Yep, that's what I'm gonna tell myself whenever I feel demotivated. Step by step. #youcandoitpk#faith
I still remember posting this 4 years ago at Facebook.
Fast forward 3 years later....
I found an opportunity...
A great opportunity that appears just perfectly right in time..
seized it before it silently went away...
A huge thank you to Ray for borrowing me his precious camera and lenses (D5100, 50mm and basic kit lens) in order for these to be produced! :D
Endless gratitude to Kah Heng and Chia Yen for joining this mini adventure, and for saying YES to my humble request! They are both very sporting and supportive to my idea and request, so tolerating, so humble and very kind people! :))
The moment when they approached me to snap a photo of them during a graduation ceremony, that was the time I knew that they are the first couple that I'm gonna approach when it comes to doing my first couple photoshoot!
There was a lot of give and take during the process, I almost thought that the plan was about to fail since we were all busy with our respective things. But phew, thank God, the plan worked and we all had a great time!
On the day of photoshoot, the weather was kind of not convincing enough for a photo taking session. It was the hazy season, btw (October 2015). We were hoping for a beautiful sun to set that evening, unfortunately it went on drizzling-raining in between the shoot, and we all had to endure it by sheltering ourselves under a huge tree while waiting for the rain to stop. Nevertheless, I did manage to snap some good photos which I hope both of them like love it! :))
Thank you so much for realizing my little dream, you two. It means so much to me, you can't even tell how many times I thank God for this golden golden opportunity.
Thank you for contributing ideas and give me suggestions, enriching my experience and ideas. Thanks to both of you for understanding and tolerating my slow speed in snapping photos, my busy schedule and delay in editing those photos. I had a wonderful time getting to know more about you two, your love story and your individual thoughts!
It was once in a lifetime opportunity, I must say. If there's such a great chance again, I am definitely 100%ly going to say yes to snapping pictures of both of you in the near future. A better and more creative set of pictures, I pinky promise!
(That's if you guys want me to be your photog again, hehe)
Anyways, it was such a great pleasure working and interacting with you two :)
What does it feels like growing up? Sucks, challenging yet exciting/thrilling at the same time. But in my case, exciting > sucks. Let's talk about the suck-ish part, shall we? The not so nice things about growing up is as you age, you will recognize who your true friends are (after you have been friending with them for years). You will get to see their true colours (the not so fancy side) and things changes. There will be countless broken promises and you'll realize that some people are meant to stay only temporarily in your life (to deliver you some life lessons), not a lifetime. Also, you will get to see the more of the ugly side of the society, you will get to see the reality of the world more clearly and in a broader understanding. Not to mention, you will meet all sorts of human beings : judgmental, busybody, sarcastic, hypocrite, immature, irresponsible, rude, cruel, and heartless people. You will often question yourself a thousand millions of why(s) and still don't get the reason until you reach a certain stage. ... As your age rises, it means that you have to be aware that your sense of responsibility increases, too. No more depending on parents, no more depending on whoever to get things done and some times even when you are helpless, you have to settle everything by yourself. You have to go through several interviews to secure a scholarship/job, go through several online applications for your future studies and you have to go through all kinds of documents/typing/beautifying your CV/etc to get the things that you want for your future. You also have to be ready to receive rejections and be prepared with back ups and what not! Are you scared now? That's the challenging part of growing up as a person I guess.
Well on a positive note, as you grow another year (I refuse to use older) awesomer, you will discover something new about yourself in every situation/person you meet. You will be lost manymanymanymanymany uncountable times, you will be dissolved in different kinds of problem and in the end, you will somehow find a solution to the problem. From there, you will know where are you and where do you stand (your ability and capacity, in another word). If you are lost, you will eventually find yourself no matter how many uncountable times you are lost or confused. Trust me, the feelings are just wonderful. And then as you move along, you start to have a collection of your favourite things, values and style, deleting the not so likeable things and eliminating the style that doesn't define yourself as a person. You will attempt a lot of things to test where do you stand in the society, you will experience many different types of 'dating' world/ observing others' to identify what kind of other half you'd like to have in life, and many many more.
"You also give yourself the opportunity for introspective & adventurous experiences of singledom, allowing you to learn more about yourself"
Besides, as you are more knowledgable, you will know more about your rights and will start to protect yourself from those who are trying to violate or harm your rights. You'll start to manage things alone, living an independent life, having your own financial account, spending what you earned, not depending on anybody anymore. Basically, you stand on both of your feet. ... When I was twelve, I told myself, "Live life to the fullest, self! You only go through form 1, 2, 3 once! Enjoy to the max before PMR"
When I was fifteen, I said, "Time flies. Enjoy every moment before high school ends!"
When I was eighteen, I thought, "Hey, there is only one and a half year at college. Make everyday counts!" When I was twenty, I announced, "Welcome to adulthood! You're officially a part of the twenties club! Live everyday as though as it is your last. Especially before 23!"
Because I solely think that when I turn 23 later, I am officially old. Now, it has already passed 12.00 am and I am officially 23? Nope not yet. I will be officially 23 years old 8 hours later, to be exact, following the reported time at my birth cert.
"your 20s are a crucial time period that allow you to explore who you really are and what you want."
Well I don't know why I have such mindset that 23 is old 23 is old. Maybe it's because of the odd number, which tells me that 23 is no longer a junior age compared to 22, 21 or 20 which are like.. pure innocent young adult. It is just like turning 13 ten years ago. A transition from primary school student to secondary student. Uniform changes, puberty strikes, yada yada. Let's be realistic. Being 23 means there is a greater responsibility, the beginning of my research year (oh my god), a far more matured thoughts, a stronger values (patience, kindness, consistency, endurance, honesty, optimism), and more attempts in stepping out of comfort zones. I guess I should stop having the 23 is old kind of mentality because it is not good! At all. It affects my thoughts, my perceptions, most importantly, my oomph! Irregardless what age we are, it is just a number. Live well and enjoy ever process as the clock ticks. Yes, you're gonna have transformation in a lot of things - your body, your mind and everything else, it's still a part of life, isn't it? Looking back, my past 22 years of life have been nothing but amazing with all kinds of bittersweet moments that I am truly thankful for, which makes me who I am today. :) ... So.. without hesitation it's time to say....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SELF!
Be the best version of yourself every single day, loving and living life to the fullest! Spread love, kindness and positivity! Must not forget to be always be humble and be grateful no matter what circumstances. Don't stop learning and discovering yourself, be proud of each step you take towards where you are heading ;) P/S : Thank YOU all wonderful human beings who have been part of my life, still staying in my life and those in the future who's gonna appear in my life to shape me/mould me to a better person. I love you all to the moon and back. PP/S : Thank you mama for having me in your tummy in a transverse position, making you having a hard time which then you had to go through C-sec to welcome me.. I am truly touched by your patience and endurance! Thank you :') PPP/S : Thank you to Papa's sperm for fertilizing mama's ovum from the (R) ovary to produce such a cute, chubby child like me :P Hahaha #perasantime well long story short, thanks to you both! PP/S : Such a weird birthday post, I know! Hahaha anyways, cheerio! xx
In this house of five, everybody has a role. Unity and harmony will not appear by its own without significant effort by each of them. What frustrates her the most is, everyone (except the youngest) loves to display egoistic character no matter what occasion. Together with stubborn trait that is glued in them, how to come together as one, you tell me? Every single year. she has to deal with this nonsensical (can be solved) matter. Every 365 days she has to hear and bear with heart stabbing questions and answers. And for 16 years she has to overcome all sorts of negative comments, smirks, sarcasms, and hateful intentions from people about her loved ones.
Seriously, guys. Stop it.
The youngest one is tired. Tired of being the centre of communication for everyone. She is tired of passing the message around, feeling frustrated with the answers (some times) and she has to channel the message to the person who asked the question, leading to even more frustration on both sides. The youngest one is helpless. Sometimes she doesn't know what to do to help to improve the situation. Talk it out? She tried but it was pointless. And she has no one to express the matter to. Because no matter how much she express, the person she expresses to can only listen, cannot help much. The youngest one wants to be appreciative but is too sad to do so, sometimes. It is really hard to be grateful especially when you are upset. Sometimes she thought, "if someone does not appreciate your move/action, why do you have to be the one who initiates/do so much every single time? Why must you let your heart hurt even more?" The youngest one has learnt to be selfish. Selfish, in this situation means, she has learnt to love herself more than everybody else, to the point that she cares less of people's welfare, etc. Because she thinks that if she waits for people to make herself happy, her heart has already died a thousand million times. Besides, she even thought of escaping and have an independent life as soon as she can to be freed from all these. Selfish, selfish but she just can't help it. The youngest one feels less inspired lately. Don't know why, (maybe it was due to the recent heavy workload of assignments) she felt less inspired than usual, rant more than usual and feel less positive than usual. But she is glad to come across Dr. Mike's twitter account, which he posted quite a number of positive quotes either from himself or from the internet, it actually comforted her, a lot. Thank you, Dr. :) Worry not, the youngest child just feels a little down lately, just need a little space to type it all out, not to brag to the whole world of what she is encountering. She will be back stronger, feeling more inspired and more positive after this. She just hopes everything will be okay. Strength! 💪 xx