All Mixed Up,

Clueless,
Undecided,
Confused,
Failling,
Helpless,
Weak,
Aimless,
Discourage,
Being controlled,
Low confidence,
Low self-esteem,
Useless,
Upset,
Dissapointed,

It's a cycle, I believe. These mixed up feelings never stop haunting me like a ghost.
Sometimes, I really don't know whom I can seek for advice, comfort, and wise words. I in all my heart, don't wish to trouble anyone but gahh.

It's killing me.

Why can't I just be better when it comes to deciding my own pathway of life?
Why can't I just be brave enough to stand up for myself?

I'm not deaf, blind nor a handicapped person. I know what's right, what's wrong.

I don't wanna lose myself.
Sigh, I'm afraid.

"No one can change you, but yourself."


-written on the day before yesterday.